Sunday, August 19, 2012

I feel happy! I feel happy!

Spending time staring at a blank screen just waiting for inspiration to come is no way to spend your time. And yet, I did this several times this weekend. I decided instead to just start writing, word vomit/stream of consciousness or not. Just write.

More than anything, I want to be published again. Maybe not in the way I was before (e.g. magazines and newspapers) but more of a novel-writing or e-publishing way. I'm just not sure where to begin. I've always loved writing and found it to be my favorite creative outlet. However, I find myself constantly hindered by my lack of ideas. At least the kind of ideas that have a beginning, middle and ending. Yeah, that makes writing rather difficult. This entry is an example of that hindrance. It must stop. 

I have been out of the writing loop for nearly 6 years now. While I've attempted to maintain some form of blog during that time, I've lost the inspiration I once had to write on a whim and form complete, coherent sentences. I think this even comes off in my speech sometimes. My co-workers look at my like I'm crazy. I can't seem to complete a thought. I'm quite the scatter brain. 

Maybe with my free time on nights and weekends, in between looking for a second job and wedding planning, I will start writing on a daily basis. I've had several people suggest that I just write something, anything to just get out there every day. So that's what I'm going to go with. Now, if I can just remember to write everyday we'll be golden. Yeah, that's the tricky part. 

I've really changed these last few years. I've met the love of my life, lost nearly 70 pounds, gained my energy back, found a way to get a full 8 hours of sleep every night (bless the Bi-Pap machine), learned to listen more and talk less (something I've always struggled with), finally getting back into cooking and baking and trying to have more fun and take a few things less seriously/personally. This makes for a much more interesting life. And far less stressful. Huzzah!

In the end, I'm happy with where my life is, but I want more. So I'm going to start with my writing and see where it takes me.

Perhaps the stream should just end there. For now.

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